Three Paragraphs.

back in high school i wrote this, and just a while ago i was hit with a desire to write some short story. when i opened word i saw this sitting on the side panel for "recently saved works" (which shows just how little i use MSWord. =/)

Anyways, this is just the first three paragraphs of that, and id like SP to give me some criticism on this if you'd be so kind. but, please try to keep it constructive is all i ask.

If your reading this, let me just tell you this story is a true retelling of my life. Not some make-believe fantasy like you would see in a cartoon, no; this is as true a story as any page in history. First off, my name is Arthur P. Thurgood, and I am 54 years old. I was in the United States of America, in 2012; the year that the world was plunged into turmoil.
I was born on April 13, Friday the 13th, no less. My parents joked that I was destined to live an incredibly unlucky life; they didn’t know how right they were. I was 5 years old when my father was sent to fight in the war. He was a lieutenant in the marines, and was sent over to Israel to try to stop an uprising by Muslim extremists in the area. Our government was afraid that the chaos stirring over there would break out into a major international incident; and had decided to send over soldiers to try to quell the anger growing their. A peace meeting was held several months after dad was sent over to try to stop the growing civil unrest and stop the violence. But, things didn’t work out as well as they had been planned.
During the signing, a group of terrorists snuck in and set off bombs they had strapped to themselves. They also placed several bombs around the outside of the building and detonated them as well. All of the delegates, along with the military guards were killed in the explosion. My father was one of the guards there. When my mother found out, she started to cry. I’ve never seen her cry so much. When I asked her what was wrong, she would only tell me “daddy had to go back to see God,” and that “he was a very good man and a hero.” I was 9 years old when he died.

Thank you.

When u mentioned friday the 13th, I thought that u were making some kind of horror thing. Besides that I just think that it could use some more action.

When u mentioned friday the 13th, I thought that u were making some kind of horror thing. Besides that I just think that it could use some more action.

like i said, its only the beginning three paragraphs to it. thanks to refinding this ive been working on something else, which is more an off-and-on project, but im going to at least work on it to prove i can still write sh'it other than poetry.

and about him being born on friday 13th, its more a setup for how his life is a bit unlucky.