What you do when a girl you know is suffering?

I know this girl which I really like, who had a fight with her mom and she kicked her out of the house, her, her dog and her stuff, she went to a friend's house until she fixed everything with her mom.

She spoke to her mom some weeks ago and she's back at her house, but during the time she was at this friend's house, and when I came to visit her, she was so sad, and I was there, listening, being useless... I couldn't do anything for her, the only thing I could do is listen, but I felt thats not enough, never did, and every other time she had problems or she's was sad, I would feel awful, like, she's right there, with pomegranate happening around her, and I'm there, unable to do anything to help her....

I hate feeling like that, specially with the girl i love, and i also feel stupid because i'm too scared to tell her how i feel, i feel like if i do, our friendship will be broken and crap ;o;

Be more vocal? If all you're doing was listening then try to give her more support through words. Not much else I can suggest.

I hate feeling like that, specially with the girl i love, and i also feel stupid because i'm too scared to tell her how i feel, i feel like if i do, our friendship will be broken and crap ;o;

You might want to think about that. You may already be in the "friend zone" and confessing your love to her with no reciprocation is going to lead to trouble.

Yeah, I've read about the friend zone, thats what its keeping me from doing it ._.

yeah I'm talk to her and stuff, but i always felt that words aren't enough...

Its like feeling empty, you know?

I know what you mean, man, I know what you mean. The "friend zone" is the worst place ever.

You could take her out for a night as a friend and show her a good time to cheer her up. Doesn't necessarily have to be anything extravagant.

Yeah we always hang out and stuff, the thing is, she sometimes acts sweet to me and sometimes she acts normal, and i can't really tell if she feels something for me, or crap... god i hate this friend zone crap...

Man, i hate when this things happen. I've been there too. my advice is: don't get stuck with the idea listening isn't enough. Sometimes, listening is the best way to understand how a person feels, and often, the person being listened feels a lot better just by the sole act of having someone there... Trust me. And as for you loving her... I'm kinda a straightforward guy so I'd say go for it man. You'll feel much better. It's worse to keep all that to yourself for a long time. It's difficult, but the best solution overtime.

Friend zone sucks. If I could give an advice, I'd say you should weigh up and see for yourself whether or not it's worth it to choose option A or B.

Apparently keeping it inside isn't going to do you any good, but she will most likely remain oblivious, and you'll get to stay around, supporting her like you always have and always will (or at least plan to). It hurts you, so think it through.

Letting it out could result in you two being happy together forever after, but it could also pineapple things up like you fear, so think it through whether or not you can bare the damage and move on if worse comes to worst.

I don't think being as dedicated as option A would be healthy for you though. At least that's what I chose. So I'm just saying.

Listening is a good trait to have, but you have to keep in mind that women use men for that. A lot of times women say you're their "friend," but really they just want to have you around so they can whine to you and give you nothing whatsoever. To a woman, using a man like that is similar to a man keeping a woman around just for sex. A woman who wants to be "just friends" is no friend to you.

Of course, plenty of guys listen to their actual female friends, but that's different because the girl will listen to you too, when you need it. The girl will be there for you, care for you, and give you help. The difference is, that the "just friends" chick will weasel out of that -- never care about what you want, just using you for what she wants. Trust me, it's easy to tell if you're a friend or a "friend." Just ask yourself if you feel used and pathetic when you're around the girl.

As far as asking her out, that's a good way to go if she knows you and trusts you a bit. Some people say that once you're friends with a girl, you can't become her boyfriend, but I disagree with that. Some women will want to be friends with you because they don't like you like that, but then, it's just as possible the girl never viewed you as boyfriend material in the first place. A ton of people I know grew from friendship to relationship, and those are actually the best ones. Trusting intimately to a person you already trust a lot is WAY easier, smoother, and better than trying to establish that rapport with a random girl through rigid routines of "lunches," "dinners," "movies," and "coffees."

Which of these three this girl is to you, you really will just have to determine for yourself. The only really hard and fast thing is, don't let your feelings blind you to the point where you're seeing what you want to see, rather than what is.

Which of these three this girl is to you, you really will just have to determine for yourself. The only really hard and fast thing is, don't let your feelings blind you to the point where you're seeing what you want to see, rather than what is.

learned that lesson myself the hard way. though, i already kinda knew that i wasnt meant for a relationship period, i felt that i ought to try and break the karma. but, this chick was just as lying and two faced as almost every other girl i talked to then.

youre in friendzone and the chick is wanting to talk to you about her problems in her tough times. i dont see what you have to be shy about. she's opening up to you. why cant you open up to her?

youre in friendzone and the chick is wanting to talk to you about her problems in her tough times. i dont see what you have to be shy about. she's opening up to you. why cant you open up to her?

Girl: "I was kicked out of my house because my mom is a b'itch. Why can't she understand me, ya know? She was a teenager once why can't i have a say in anything? *Cries*"
Guy: "I LOVE YOU GO OUT WITH ME PLS."

Makes perfect sense. o.o

i didnt say "confess your love", i said "open up to her". if you just move in for the kill at a time like this, she'll just think you're an insensitive plantain who's trying to get through her pants; which you are but you dont want to reveal that yet.

i didnt say "confess your love", i said "open up to her". if you just move in for the kill at a time like this, she'll just think you're an insensitive plantain who's trying to get through her pants; which you are but you dont want to reveal that yet.

Speaking of trying to get through her pants, who's the girl in your avatar?

I just think it's a tad odd that you're considering loving her or going out with her but you can't open up to her in a time of need. She's asking for your help, man. Be heartfelt and connect with her on an intellectual level. Your own desire to not screw things up is actually pushing her away from you when she needs your attention. You got everything backwards dude. Don't even worry about the friend zone or going out with her - how is that even an issue when she's in pain? Use this time to open up to each other and get closer. Learn more about her.

Speaking of trying to get through her pants, who's the girl in your avatar?

Photoshopped McSlutpants.

Next time, give her a hug, make her understand that you're there for her.

If you can't do it with words, do it with actions.

I just think it's a tad odd that you're considering loving her or going out with her but you can't open up to her in a time of need. She's asking for your help, man. Be heartfelt and connect with her on an intellectual level. Your own desire to not screw things up is actually pushing her away from you when she needs your attention. You got everything backwards dude. Don't even worry about the friend zone or going out with her - how is that even an issue when she's in pain? Use this time to open up to each other and get closer. Learn more about her.

I think it's more of the lines of, because he 'loves' her he wants help her. Hes not immediatly going for "LETS GO OUT" but I see where he's coming from. We can't really tell him to talk to her about it because she could be one of those types who likes to dominate the conversation and frankly just wants to rant. Does that neccessarily mean hes being used? Not in this instance because shes opening him up to her personal life, she trusts him to listen. I don't know your responses but I mean, I hope you are making it clear you're listening.

She acts tough, she never really lets me hug her or anything, well, she's like that with most people, she always says "please don't or ill break into tears", something like that, so most of the times i help her with anything i can, talk to her, tell her everything is going to be fine and try to keep her happy.

I guess that SOMETIME ill have to tell her, otherwise ill be stuck feeling like this forever ._.

Thanks for the advice guys

She acts tough, she never really lets me hug her or anything, well, she's like that with most people, she always says "please don't or ill break into tears", something like that, so most of the times i help her with anything i can, talk to her, tell her everything is going to be fine and try to keep her happy.

I guess that SOMETIME ill have to tell her, otherwise ill be stuck feeling like this forever ._.

Thanks for the advice guys

Force a hug, girls always like the opposite of what they ask for

Seriously though, just force a hug and be like "I don't care just break out, ya need it"

Thats what I'd do