The Thread of More True Honesty.

I'm very insecure about myself but people around me always see a very confident and fun guy.

I can never finish more than half of whatever I get when I go out to eat but when I'm at home I can scarf it down no problem.

I.. feel alone frequently when I have a quiet moment alone to think. I have all the people in the world who love me but... they feel really distant sometimes. Either the people I hang with are an impossible distance away from me or moving that way.

Other than that I'd say life is pretty good... minus being broke for the first time in 3 years despite having 2 jobs that pay better than the last 1 I had.(That's a whole another rant right there folks.)

mustering up the courage to talk to girls is hard for me; the actual talking to them is very easy.

I flirt with women I'm not supposed to. Like co-workers or sisters/moms(lol) of buddies. But I never go beyond that, even if they want to.

Don't know why! I think I have a problem.

I enjoy watching Desperate Housewives and Cougar Town. And I used to have 18 cats.

Seriously? Both of these facts are completely disgusting but I'm not sure which grosses me out more. 18 cats is unsanitary. Cougar Town is just awful. DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES.

Not sure....

I have soft skin.

I flirt with women I'm not supposed to. Like co-workers or sisters/moms(lol) of buddies. But I never go beyond that, even if they want to.

Don't know why! I think I have a problem.

I don't even know how to flirt.

Seriously? Both of these facts are completely disgusting but I'm not sure which grosses me out more. 18 cats is unsanitary. Cougar Town is just awful. DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES.

Not sure....

We all have our guilty pleasures. And a lot of the cats were outside cats. I love cats.

I chew on pencils.

I eat like a pregnant woman.
Stuff like peanut butter jelly and potato chip sandwiches,
tuna and grape jelly,
ice cream and olives,
bacon and whipped cream, stuff like that.

I've never learned to ride a bicycle. :C

I've never learned to ride a bicycle. :C

This.

I might have an eating disorder.

I am highly attracted to older, more hairy and muscular guys.
More known as "bears" in the gay community.


I don't just like asians.

 Spoiler

But when the two meet, omg.

I'm afraid to tell my friends here that I like MLP, though I'm advancing. Told about 6 friends about it, two tried out (that I know of) and 1 joined the herd.

I'm afraid that I'm going to push my fiance away due to my only other 2 boyfriends who abused me. My fiance is amazing and he'd never hurt me or treat me like sh*t, but yet I'm still scared and I walk on eggshells afraid to speak my mind. He never judges me but I judge myself way too much. Oh, and, I want another baby. Bad. Very bad. So bad I'm willing to get married at the court house so we can have one. I've been told I have less than 2 years to get pregnant before I can't anymore...

I need help or something.

I don't know how to let go.

I've never learned to ride a bicycle. :C

Dude! It's never too late! It's one of my favorite hobbies. You'll enjoy it!

Recently i've started unconsciously taking the opposite side of whatever someone tells me. If my girl tells me her next test is going to be really tough and she needs to study, i'll pass it off and tell her she's really smart and should have no problem (which is true). If she tells me her next test should be a breeze, I tell her to not take it lightly and make sure she studies hard. I don't know why, and I haven't always done it.

I feel very alone almost all the time.

Since the potential system was released, according to Nexon's records I have spent the equivalent $3,560 on NX, $2,320 of which was prepaid and $1,220 of which was credit. This was basically my entire recreation budget and much much more over that 11 months, I am currently £1242.50 overdrawn with an overdraft limit of £1250 and if I don't find some cash to shove in there I'll be over that limit once the next monthly mobile phone bill is paid. I have also MTS'd 1,004,003 NX. Amongst other things (including over 20 royal hair tickets) that NX went on 2559 cubes, 660 of which were in bundles of 11 and 71 premium cubes. This comes to a total of 3,218,900 NX spent on the potential system by me and me alone. Highest %mainstat I reached on a single character with that amount was 143 for all that matters.

I should add, I have zero income and am totally reliant on interest-free student loans during term time.

tl;dr: I'm really really really irresponsible and need to grow up really really quickly.

Every night I imagine finding myself a sweet oriental girl who just got dumped by her cruel and sadistic boyfriend. And I would take her into my home and introduce her to American home cooking. And at first she would be all shy and polite with her head lowered and expect me to abuse her like her Asian boyfriends, but I wouldn't. I would get her on her feet, allow her to stand tall and let her know it was okay to look me in the eye. And she would start trembling and crying and breaking down in my arms and I would just hug her and kiss her and let her know that no man would ever lay a harmful hand on her ever again.

Then I would teach her the Western concepts of freedom and self-determination. And I would love her tenderly and she would be so grateful for a man that actually cares about her pleasure and her hopes and dreams for once. She would become a successful musician or businesswoman and we would raise beautiful kids together. ;_;