What to do in able to move out of parents' house?

Hi SouthPerry.

I am here to ask for advice / pointers, because in around a year and a half, I will be planning on moving out. Before you assume, this isn't a "WOE IS ME" thread, this is not the intention. I don't care to discuss about my problems with my parents, I just need some advice from others that hopefully know what they're talking about.

Just in case anybody wants to ask, I only have an "Associate's in Applied Science" (Computer Networking), and I only have 42/126 credits left to complete. Which is in about a year and a half's worth of time, since I don't take Summer classes. I do plan on working somewhere in the city very shortly once I graduate, and I do know how competitive my field is at the moment. I'm planning on just doing something 'easy' once I move out, a job that I won't get too stressed out with.

I do know that some companies such as UPMC and PNC Bank will have Customer Service positions, so I might look into that. I actually did at least one interview at PNC, and they called me back last year asking if I wanted to work, since they were impressed with my resume and interview. I couldn't accept it at the time due to these reasons:

a) I was still in school
b) Driving to Pittsburgh = 45 mins (assuming there's no traffic, it's not rush-hour, etc)
c) Not enough money stored up to afford money on all that gas
d) 5 hours a day, Mon-Fri (total = 25 hrs / wk)

Their starting pay was $15/hr at the time, and that was with having just a 2 yr degree. ^

What I'm planning on doing now is just finishing up school and see where I can go from there, but I can't stay at my parents' house because the stress isn't worth it. I am planning to either still live in this town, or move to the city IF I have a job up there. If not, it's a 45 minutes drive to the city, and another 45 back every day for work. If I stay in town though, I will most likely be able to have a roommate and split the costs down.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated, and I am actually already doing research on the subject. Thanks for your help, SouthPerry.

[spoiler=Why I can't stay in this house]I know that moving out is a risky subject, because there's many things to consider such as the costs of living alone, food, electric & heating bills, etc. But I really would prefer this over being stressed out because of having arguments with my old man, and it isn't worth it to live my life being restricted about everything, especially since my dad doesn't know what he's talking about.

Sick of getting in arguments with him, and I can't help it because he's just hard-headed. You want an example? Here's one:

He called me downstairs yesterday and said that he had received an email from Comcast stating that someone was downloading something online via Bittorrent. A movie or something, and he thought it was me. I told him that I do not use torrents, and the fact that he DID NOT lock up his router's connection with a password was his fault, since I have forewarned him for the past 2 years. He doesn't like to listen to me, and always thinks he's right.

I can't live in a house like that, it's really irritating, and not only that.. he told me to set a password and do it by myself. I asked for the manual of the router, and he said he doesn't have it around because it would be a waste of space. At soon as he said that, I felt infuriated. So basically, my point is that he wanted me to fix his mistakes because he got a damn email from Comcast, when I have clearly warned him for the past two years. I have told him over and over to set a password, and he knew how at the time, but didn't want to do it. Why? His reason:

"I don't feel like typing it. No one's going to connect to our network and do anything bad anyways. Stop worrying."

See how far that got him? Not very.

It's not only this, but there are a lot of reasons, it stacks on, etc. I don't get along with my father at all, we both have different personalities, and I'm not alike him at all. I know that moving out is risky, and that there are a lot of responsibilities, but I'd rather be miserable THAT WAY if I did mess up. I also will try to not burn any bridges down when I decide to leave, but I'd rather move out, considering all of my options at the moment.[/spoiler]

Also, in case anybody asks if my dad pays for any of college. Since the start of college, he has never spent a penny on my college funds. I'm doing everything by myself.

The first thing when moving out is just consider your cost of living. You'll need to realize that your money is no longer fun money and has to be properly allocated to paying bills, and hopefully having some left over to set aside for a rainy day. Other than that it's all pretty much common sense as (not that that bit isn't, but it seems most people just straight up can't do that).

I envy you.
I think it might be too early to start wondering about details.
Looking for places to live, prices and whatnot... it's really early, unless you just want an estimate.
If that's the case I'd look up decent places to live and their prices, food&services prices, gas and whatnot. Add "few" bucks to each thing because things get pricier every year.
Then I'd think about the jobs I might be able to get and if they can pay for my survival.
The only thing I'd advice you is to start saving as much as possible from now on. If there are any emergencies, when living on your own, it would be great to have few saved bucks.

The first thing when moving out is just consider your cost of living. You'll need to realize that your money is no longer fun money and has to be properly allocated to paying bills, and hopefully having some left over to set aside for a rainy day. Other than that it's all pretty much common sense as (not that that bit isn't, but it seems most people just straight up can't do that).

Yeah, I'm actually super-aware of that right now, actually. In terms of clothing, if I need some, I guess I'll just go to Marshall's or some place that sells used clothing. I'd rather stay away from the mall because sh`it there isn't always great quality, and not only that, but sh`it are always logo'd to death (ie: American Eagle, Abercrombie, Aero, etc). Clothing in malls are also super expensive too, so.. yeah.

In terms of food, I will have to buy groceries and cook for myself since it's cheaper that way (in comparison to buying 1 dollar frozen entrees). I've been buying groceries since I was little though, so I know what to shop for, and I can cook. So I can fend for myself rather well in terms of cooking, but I am actually worried about things such as a mattress. I might just buy an inflatable mattress. Or just spread out a sheet and sleep on the floor.

I envy you.
I think it might be too early to start wondering about details.
Looking for places to live, prices and whatnot... it's really early, unless you just want an estimate.
If that's the case I'd look up decent places to live and their prices, food&services prices, gas and whatnot. Add "few" bucks to each thing because things get pricier every year.
Then I'd think about the jobs I might be able to get and if they can pay for my survival.
The only thing I'd advice you is to start saving as much as possible from now on. If there are any emergencies, when living on your own, it would be great to have few saved bucks.

Actually, about that. I actually have a couple hundred bucks on only ONE of my credit cards that I need to pay back, once I work full-time this Summer and pay back everything, I think I'm going to learn how to conserve money as I go to school for the following Fall semester. I'll keep track to see how much money I spend a day, up to a week, up to a month, etc. From there, I can estimate to see if I can live by myself. But like I said, I won't be able to move out anyways since I want a stable job. I am of course, also going to be saving money after this Summer. I'm also going to be taking 15 credits, instead of only 12 (as usual ; as I normally do). I want to speed this up so I can get out fast.

My goal to keep up that motivation would be: "I will be able to get the f`uck out of here if I finish school fast."

well, maturity is a big requirement for moving out. Anyway, things you gonna need are:
- materialistic stuff eg bed, clothing, cookwares, etc, the general things you use daily
- steady income
- learn to manage your account, ie rent, bills, food, travels, etc. Know how much you can spend and how much you earn.

That's a start

Yeah, I'm actually super-aware of that right now, actually. In terms of clothing, if I need some, I guess I'll just go to Marshall's or some place that sells used clothing. I'd rather stay away from the mall because sh`it there isn't always great quality, and not only that, but sh`it are always logo'd to death (ie: American Eagle, Abercrombie, Aero, etc). Clothing in malls are also super expensive too, so.. yeah.

In terms of food, I will have to buy groceries and cook for myself since it's cheaper that way (in comparison to buying 1 dollar frozen entrees). I've been buying groceries since I was little though, so I know what to shop for, and I can cook. So I can fend for myself rather well in terms of cooking, but I am actually worried about things such as a mattress. I might just buy an inflatable mattress. Or just spread out a sheet and sleep on the floor.




Actually, about that. I actually have a couple hundred bucks on only ONE of my credit cards that I need to pay back, once I work full-time this Summer and pay back everything, I think I'm going to learn how to conserve money as I go to school for the following Fall semester. I'll keep track to see how much money I spend a day, up to a week, up to a month, etc. From there, I can estimate to see if I can live by myself. But like I said, I won't be able to move out anyways since I want a stable job. I am of course, also going to be saving money after this Summer. I'm also going to be taking 15 credits, instead of only 12 (as usual ; as I normally do). I want to speed this up so I can get out fast.

My goal to keep up that motivation would be: "I will be able to get the f`uck out of here if I finish school fast."

15 credits instead of 12 as usual? :O
Your classes must be great then and you must study/work alot for every credit.
I must see at least 17 each semester to get enough work/things to study.
Right now I'm at 15 credits and half my week is free, almost no homework....

You're not gonna like my advice but I would say....stay at home as long as possible and save your money.
So many of my friends thought that they had enough money and whatnot to be out on their own, only to move back home after about a year or less.
It may not be ideal for you or for your parents but unless they are at the point of kicking you out, you should try to hack staying home.

If you absolutely have to move out and don't mind living with other students/roomies. I would check out local community programs that offer really cheap rooms and efficientcies to students. Some of these places offer room and board for as long as you are attending school. Most of these places are "all bills paid" so that should help a lot.
Sorry I couldn't be more help.

In regards to clothing:If you're willing to be a couple of months behind in the fashion scene, the brands you listed have excellent deals in their clearance sections online where you'll save anywhere from 25-75% off on their clothes.

Things tend to go in a circle, you work for money, you use that money to survive till you get more money from work.
The hard part is getting INTO that circle. Either you have to start working first, or start surviving until you get the money from work first.

Idealistically, I think you should start saving up from now, and allow enough money to survive on for a good quarter at least while you look for work to maintain that lifestyle.

I moved out last month and I'd just like to say that it's a lot more work than you're probably expecting but if you do all of it it's certainly worth it.

You're not gonna like my advice but I would say....stay at home as long as possible and save your money.
So many of my friends thought that they had enough money and whatnot to be out on their own, only to move back home after about a year or less.
It may not be ideal for you or for your parents but unless they are at the point of kicking you out, you should try to hack staying home.

If you absolutely have to move out and don't mind living with other students/roomies. I would check out local community programs that offer really cheap rooms and efficientcies to students. Some of these places offer room and board for as long as you are attending school. Most of these places are "all bills paid" so that should help a lot.
Sorry I couldn't be more help.

I read your response the other day, but I didn't have enough time to formulate my thoughts and think about what I was going to say. I've actually thought about that a bunch of times, and I realize that staying at home benefits me a lot because everything's already there, and I won't have to work my ass off. However, I would eventually like to move out anyways. I want to have responsibilities, I want to make mistakes, etc. From doing all of that, I will learn to be a more responsible young-adult. I don't get along with either of my parents, we argue almost every day and it's driving me insane. It gets really bad when all of my friends tells me that I need to find another place to live just so I can get the stress off of my back. I feel as if my life's being hindered because of my own parents at times, though I understand that they do care about my education and well being.

I love them to death, I respect them both up to a point, but I cannot get along with them. I hope this makes sense. I will probably visit the house every once in a while to see my little brother though. I told my brother years ago that I'd move out eventually, and I did mean it. I just don't want to make a hasty decision and regret it because as of now, I realize that it's impossible. Even if it were to be slightly possible and having to deal with a retail job, I would surely be miserable and in loans / debts. Which is why I will gladly wait until I get my education done and have some backed-up money to save my carcass while the money starts accumulating in the bank.

In regards to clothing:If you're willing to be a couple of months behind in the fashion scene, the brands you listed have excellent deals in their clearance sections online where you'll save anywhere from 25-75% off on their clothes.

I'm not too worried about that, and like I said, I can afford used clothes. I have a lot of clothing in my closet right now, I think only 20-30% = my brother's, since we share the same closet. But I have enough clothing to last me for a while. I'll probably wear the same shirt for every two days or so too, just to conserve laundry costs. I actually thought about this over and over.

Things tend to go in a circle, you work for money, you use that money to survive till you get more money from work.
The hard part is getting INTO that circle. Either you have to start working first, or start surviving until you get the money from work first.

Idealistically, I think you should start saving up from now, and allow enough money to survive on for a good quarter at least while you look for work to maintain that lifestyle.

I completely agree with you, getting into that mindset is going to be hard for me, since how I'm used to spending my money as I'm currently living with my parents as of now is entirely different than how I will be spending money when I move out. I have to change how I think a lot when it comes to affording the necessities.

I am also in the process of trying to move out/support myself. Right now im still finishing school and live in a house on campus that my parents pay rent for, i pay for utilities, food, etc. I understand that you are not happy living at home and want to move out for that reason, but i really think that the best option is to try and stick it out as long as you can so that you can find a steady job and start saving some money. Then look for a cheap apartment close to your job if possible.

Even at 15/hr working 40 hours a week, its going to be tough. Thats only 2400ish a month before taxes and rent is gonna take up 1/3 to 1/2 of that most likely.

Maybe you have more money saved up than i do, college really took its toll on my bank account , but I don't think i would really consider trying to live on my own til i had a few months rent saved up.

I didn't have all of the usual parent problems. My dad died when I was eight and my mom worked all the time so I hardly ever saw her. I graduated early and went to college when I was sixteen not because I wanted but because my mom wanted me to. She'd been through a lot and I didn't want to dissappoint her so I left Louisiana to go to college in Texas. I was lucky because money wasn't a problem for me. We weren't rich but with the scholarship I got and the money I saved over the years, it helped tremendously. I had two jobs so I worked all the time. They say that your college experience is supposed to be one of the best times of your life but I absolutely hated it. I wish I would have just stayed home and gone to school locally.

I don't know you but from what I have seen, you seem to have a good head on your shoulders and the right ideas in mind so you should do really well when you finally do get out on your own. I wish you lots of luck. ^_^