The most awesome story in the history of stories.

and then Chuck Norris comes and kills everyone with his Chinchilla powers.

THE END!

And then the g-man shows up to pull everyone to a different dimension and time

Thanks man.
Masterchief emerges and finds a giant mushroom and an invincibility star. He takes them and destroys part of the Earth.

J.D. Salinger edits his book to include more "goddamn"s.

Then a rain of arrows falls apon all, including Masterchief. All perish, except one. Flaxative emerges from the rubble and shouts triumphantly, only to be hit by the last arrow.