"The Bible is Scientifically Accurate"

From the February 2009 issue of Awake! titled "Earth, designed for life", there was a box on the bottom right corner:

THE BIBLE IS SCIENTIFICALLY ACCURATE

The earth is suspended in space. "He is stretching out the north over the empty place, hanging the earth upon nothing." -Job 26:7, stated about 1613 B.C.E.

The earth is round. "There is One who is dwelling above the circle of the earth." -Isaiah 40:22, written about 732 B.C.E.

Water moves in a cycle. "All the winter torrents are going forth to the sea... To the place where the winter torrents are going forth, there they are returning so as to go forth." -Ecclesiastes 1:7, written before 1,000 B.C.E.

The universe is governed by laws. "I [Jehovah] had appointed... the statutes [or, laws] of heaven and earth." -Jeremiah 33:25, written before 580 B.C.E.

This has got to be the funniest shi't I've seen all week.

Eeesh, Awake! is still around? D:

EDIT: and you rock, read my PMs but didn't get around to answering (must be starstruck). thanks

Eeesh, Awake! is still around? D:

Yes...

BTW, I hope I don't offend anyone.

sorry, i hope i don't offend anyone either. i just had no idea they were still going.

my dad has a collection of awake! from since .. the 80s?

it made me giggle like a shoolgirl on crack

AKA: i loved the joke

LMAO! Earth is round has to be the funniest part considering what really went down long ago. XD

Thanks for the laughs, Harrison.

Pig = Animal
Pelican = Animal

Therefore pigs can fly.

Pig = Animal
Pelican = Animal

Therefore pigs can fly.

If you shoot them out of a cannon, they can.

Pig = Animal
Pelican = Animal

Therefore pigs can fly.

If you shoot them out of a cannon, they can.

Don't forget about the old age of vac hacking at Pig Beach in MS! Go go flying pigs!

Pig = Animal
Pelican = Animal

Therefore pigs can fly.

The funniest part about this is that Awake! merely relied on hindsight to obtain those quotes. If those quotes were so "quotes" in the past, people would not believe that the earth is flat.

Also, I like how Awake! used only a four "correct" quotes from the bible to make the assumption that the bible is "scientifically accurate". There is no hypothesis, nor testing at all. I don't think they know the true meaning of science.

*wonders who writes these*