"Can't I call him darling?"
#1
alright, so I work as a lab consultant in the computer labs here. I help people out with minor troubleshooting issues, but this one issue I won't forget from tonight.

I'm sitting at my workstation and a tall, blonde man in his 30's comes up to me. He has a very thick dutch/germanic accent.

HIM: "Could I ask you a question?"
ME: "Of course. How can I help you?"
HIM: "When is it okay to use the word darling?"
ME: "Uhh... it really depends on the context. What's happening?"
HIM: "Well, like, is it okay for a guy to call another guy darling or is that strange?"
ME: "Might be a bit strange. Usually it's used from guy to girl on a more personal level. Or people use it when imitating rich people: 'dah-ling'. Otherwise, it's probably not a word you'd want to use on a guy. It might come out wrong."
HIM: "What would be a good replacement then? Something similar for a guy?"
ME: "What kind of relationship do you have with him? Acquaintance? Long-time friend? What?"
HIM: "Well, let's just say we've been friends for a while."
ME: "Just say 'buddy', or 'bro', which is short for 'brother'. That's good enough."
HIM: "What is wrong with darling? Can't I call him darling?"
ME: "Probably not a good idea. Just stick with buddy or bro."
HIM: "Okay, thank you."

He left, and I'm left wtp'ing at the convo. Five minutes later he comes back.

HIM: "I have another question."
ME: "Go ahead."
HIM: "He says he peed."
ME: "He what?"
HIM: "He peed. Is that slang for something?"
ME: "Well, what is the sentence? I need some context."
HIM: "I'll be right back. I write it down."

He goes back to his computer, writes it down, and comes back.

HIM: Here, I have this. *He hands me a sheet of paper*

The paper reads, "Don't you remember how I peed? It was everywhere."

ME: "Oh, well, peeing is like... Well, do you know what a penis is?"

He turned beet red.

HIM: "Yes?"
ME: "Well, the yellow stuff out of the penis. When it shoots out. That is peeing. He peed, so he was peeing in the past."
HIM: "OH! THAT'S PEEING!" (Ed: He said that a bit loud)
ME: "Is there anything else I can do to help you sir?"
HIM: "Nono, thank you much."

I went to the bathroom, shat bricks, and cried myself to tears.
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#2
Oh lawd.

That was hilarous.

Sounds like an interesting job, this the only time something like this has ever occured?
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#3
Thanks for giving me my wtcrap moment of the day
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#4
Computer Lab consultant? At first, I thought it was a HelpDesk / Customer Service job, but regardless, that was full of lol. Gotta love people that weren't born and raised in America!
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#5
LOL.

Only world that does that justice.
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#6
Wow...wow... thanks for giving me my laugh for the day.
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#7
OMG LOL Interesting job you have there Fiel
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#8
lolwutspeeing
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#9
Bad parenting is what caused this to happen to him I bet.
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#10
fiel darling, you own
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#11
Words can't express how epic that was. Glitter
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#12
Better than explaining what crapping is. Or is it?
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#13
...
Lol.
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#14
it's not gay unless the balls touch
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#15
ItachiPower Wrote:Bad parenting is what caused this to happen to him I bet.

Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I do wonder if he actually speaks english as a first language Wink
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#16
wtp?


is 'peed' slang for something else? because that person who he's talking to is fucked up

'do you remember how i peed?'
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#17
I wish I get a job that's even half as interesting as Fiel's.
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#18
Fiel Wrote:I'm sitting at my workstation and a tall, blonde man in his 30's comes up to me. He has a very thick dutch/germanic accent.
Hmmm, blonde male with a dutch/germanic accent? Yes, he has to be german, dutch people can't be that retarded! Big Grin

At least... I hope so...lol xD
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#19
Ah, I see it so clearly now.
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#20
I wanna work as customer service for Nexon. It would fulfill my dream of telling people "pineapple you" all day long.
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