2012-09-03, 08:00 PM
Got kicked out of the house for not working on Labor Day. Yeah don't bother rationalizing it.
So basically the momster accused me of being cooped up in my room. So I said, I'll go downstairs to do work (my room is upstairs). But she explained that it wasn't what she was getting at. So I told her, oh you want me out of the house. Then I'll leave the house. She's like no, that's not what I'm getting at and you're misconstruing what I'm saying.
I'm like, lol, dude momster what ARE you getting at this time you crazy psychopathic slut. She's like, you have no friends. I'm like, man, you want me to get friends. I can get friends easy. I can go out to the overpass and make like five to six friends EASY. She's like no that's not what I'm getting at. So I'm like, dude momster what ARE you getting at. She's like, you don't do anything extra at church like I do, you only go on Sundays and you don't do service two extra days of the weeks.
I'm like, momster, I got a full time job and have been doing this ridiculous test prep, give me a break. So then the momster has to pull out the card that I'm not doing anything efficient. Mind you this is AFTER she dragged me for a three day vacation on the spot to the bloody mountains in the middle of nowhere and we JUST returned.
I'm like, ok momster. I'll talk to you later. I'm not dealing with you today if you're going to keep riding me up like a stripper pole. Cue in packing bags and leaving. Cue in momster telling me NOT to leave so she could use me as a verbal punching bag some more. I tell the momster, hey momster you can stop me I haven't reached the car yet. You can try to tackle me, look I'll start walking slowly so you still have a chance to beat me to the driver's seat so you can block it. You can even call the cops and try to have them arrest me for independent movement. Cue in slamming of the house door and her shouting at me to go **** myself and die. Then I saw my dad running out the door like he's Alabama's offensive line about to charge through Michigan. I approximated the distance and figured I HAD to confront my mad. Hey dad, why are you so mad do you KNOW what's going on between me and the momster? No? Ok good. Look I've got to do **** and I've GOT to go. Jet the car. Drive off before mad can get mad again.
Cue in entire day of driving up and down the Garden State Parkway while going through a case of non-alcoholic beverages and culminating in watching Lawless in some theater in Sayreville and trying to book it at a hotel but deciding otherwise at the last moment. Good times. Mad is still mad. Thinks that I have something to do with the momster who is now missing. I am not related to these people. At all.
So basically the momster accused me of being cooped up in my room. So I said, I'll go downstairs to do work (my room is upstairs). But she explained that it wasn't what she was getting at. So I told her, oh you want me out of the house. Then I'll leave the house. She's like no, that's not what I'm getting at and you're misconstruing what I'm saying.
I'm like, lol, dude momster what ARE you getting at this time you crazy psychopathic slut. She's like, you have no friends. I'm like, man, you want me to get friends. I can get friends easy. I can go out to the overpass and make like five to six friends EASY. She's like no that's not what I'm getting at. So I'm like, dude momster what ARE you getting at. She's like, you don't do anything extra at church like I do, you only go on Sundays and you don't do service two extra days of the weeks.
I'm like, momster, I got a full time job and have been doing this ridiculous test prep, give me a break. So then the momster has to pull out the card that I'm not doing anything efficient. Mind you this is AFTER she dragged me for a three day vacation on the spot to the bloody mountains in the middle of nowhere and we JUST returned.
I'm like, ok momster. I'll talk to you later. I'm not dealing with you today if you're going to keep riding me up like a stripper pole. Cue in packing bags and leaving. Cue in momster telling me NOT to leave so she could use me as a verbal punching bag some more. I tell the momster, hey momster you can stop me I haven't reached the car yet. You can try to tackle me, look I'll start walking slowly so you still have a chance to beat me to the driver's seat so you can block it. You can even call the cops and try to have them arrest me for independent movement. Cue in slamming of the house door and her shouting at me to go **** myself and die. Then I saw my dad running out the door like he's Alabama's offensive line about to charge through Michigan. I approximated the distance and figured I HAD to confront my mad. Hey dad, why are you so mad do you KNOW what's going on between me and the momster? No? Ok good. Look I've got to do **** and I've GOT to go. Jet the car. Drive off before mad can get mad again.
Cue in entire day of driving up and down the Garden State Parkway while going through a case of non-alcoholic beverages and culminating in watching Lawless in some theater in Sayreville and trying to book it at a hotel but deciding otherwise at the last moment. Good times. Mad is still mad. Thinks that I have something to do with the momster who is now missing. I am not related to these people. At all.