[NSFW] Southperotica.

 Spoiler

"I told you to wait for me to finish with you!" Said steveTaker. he looked longingly in Sarah's soft, sweet eyes as she lay on top of his meager form, both of them panting out loud. Her chest against his, pressing down on top of joystick.

Taker then pushed her off, the sweat dripping from his forehead. He reached down and picked his controller back up from off of the floor and threw it at Sarah's face. Deftly she dodged, only the tip of it whipping across her cheek. The look in their eyes was akin to that of two ferocious lions ready to pounce.

Sarah regained her composure and stood up, taking her stance to ready for Taker's next volley, arms poised to grasp him and throw him to the ground. Then, suddenly Bacon appeared on the ground and caused them both to slip up and fall onto a Spidey, crushing it instantly, the gooey mess splattering all across the floor. With a Grog, Sarah lept forward and slashed at Takers feet, causing him to land face first into a pan of mass. The mass was so hot and intense that it caused his eyes to burn from the intense heat. Sarah then let out a laugh and pointed at Taker, his hind quarters proudly at attention in the air underneath his blue jeans.

Taker rose to his feet and grabbed the TV remote and I changed the channel. Mindless comedy slapstick isnt my thing, so i began to search the various news and mindless entertainment channels on the TV. i came upon a network which was hosted by a group of men that went by the name Opeth, and their leader was holding a stereo in his hand, kind of like you'd see those annoying black panthers do in the old days. there was something going on where opeth was going to invade this dude Mira's apartment, but they looked really gay and they had no sense of fashion surprisingly, so instead i flipped to the next channel, where a bunch of numbers randomly strolled down my screen.

After that i got up off of my couch to see that the pans still sat on my stove with a bunch of grease accumulating inside. it had been days since i had last decided to clean them, so much as to even acknowledge they were there. my cleaning maid from Sunrise Service hadnt arrived yet, the damned woman went by the name Devil. Though ive nothing against the various cultures in this world, i just found it odd for a devil to be a cleaning maid that worked at a place called sunrise. the thought amused me.

i went to the fridge and saw the various containers of tupperware filled with all kinds of moldy and smelly foods growing their own ecosystems inside, with several scattered cans of Throws soda. sadly the soda was long since flat, and it was hard to even want to bring myself to suffer through drinking the flat drink. I then saw in the back a partially open package of a BetaClaw bear claw pastry. the wrapping had been open for about a day or so, but the food stuff inside looked like it did come out of a bears mouth after festering for a few days.

overall the food there was entirely lackluster, and even the damned Isaac store logo on the door was starting to peel, so i picked up my cape and wizards hat and began a magical adventure with my two friends Ren and Shirley, and together we set out to defeat the evil Velgaldenmart.

the end.

I don't want to discourage you but this is terrible. Try again but... keep it simple. TOO MANY NAMES. It goes between third person and first person. There's no hilarious sexuality and apparently I am part tiger or werewolf or something for the first two paragraphs. It just seems like a lot of ideas scribbled down.

ITT: Writing tips.