I need to fap harder

Last fap was 2 weeks ago? Enjoy your prostate cancer. Fapping is actually good for you. I aim for at least 200 faps a year, easy to obtain. Why 200? Because Oprah said so in order to extend your life by a good 5 years.

You don't need to climax that frequently to feel the beneficial effects of it o_o doing anything excessively is bad for you, although 200 is pretty reasonable I guess.