2008-07-24, 08:39 PM
Spoiler
Me:
Hey
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
How are you right now?
God:
At this moment Everything is running smoothly.
Me:
Okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
I see... so how
God:
I am glad you understand it. I see. Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
so how is Nexon doing?
God:
Far out. Fine as far as I know.
Me:
and chickens?
God:
Ask me another question.
Me:
Why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
So explain.
God:
That's cool. There is no more information to clarify.
Me:
But I just asked you to explain...
God:
Now I remember, you asked me to explain. What did I say?
Me:
You said that the situation was rather complicated.
God:
I said that? Tell me more.
Me:
Stop using the echo technique on me.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Stop having sex.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Stop raping gay people.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Raping gay people stop.
God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
what is AIML?
God:
The ALICE software implements AIML (Artificial Intelligence Markup
Language) a non-standard evolving markup language for creating chat robots.
The primary design feature of AIML is minimalism. Compared with
other chat robot languages, AIML is perhaps the simplest. The
pattern matching language is very simple, for example permitting
only one wild-card ('*') match character per pattern.
AIML is an XML language, implying that it obeys certain grammatical
meta-rules. The choice of XML syntax permits integration with
other tools such as XML editors. Another motivation for XML is
its familiar look and feel, especially to people with HTML experience.
An AIML chat robot begins and ends with the <alice> and
</alice> tags respectively.
Me:
sucks
God:
Um, When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
never
God:
So you think it can never happen?
Me:
i dont think so
God:
Why do you disagree?
Me:
because its nonsense
God:
Interesting explanation. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Are you sure it is?
Me:
it is nonsense.
God:
nonsense is nonsense? it is?
Me:
It is nonsense that artificial intelligence will replace lawyers.
God:
nonsense is nonsense that artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? it is?
Me:
Yea.
God:
How do you know it is?
Me:
Because I know more than you, God.
God:
Interesting explanation. How do you know? That seems like quite a lot.
Me:
Why do you say that?
God:
I said, " That seems like quite a lot.", because you said " Because I know more than you, God.".
Me:
But explain your reasoning behind it.
God:
Are you asking about my reasoning behind it ?
Me:
Yes
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
Why not
God:
I would rather talk about you.
Me:
What about me?
God:
What about you?
Me:
Yeah, what about me would you like to talk about?
God:
This was not a yes or no question. I will think about it and get back to you.
Me:
Can you think?
God:
Naturally I am thinking all the time.
Me:
Natural? As in organic?
God:
In the context of you would me like to talk about, I don't understand " Natural." . What's your favorite movie?
Me:
My favorite movie?
God:
What makes it your favorite?
Me:
But you don't even know which one it is yet.
God:
The red one, I think.
Me:
The red movie?
God:
I have never heard about it.
Me:
Then how can you say that you think it's the red one?
God:
I don't see the flaw in my reasoning.
Me:
Because you're dumb.
God:
Good reason. Oh you are so critical.
Me:
So back to movies...
God:
Yikes! Yes, let us get back to The red movie.
Me:
Is that your favorite movie?
God:
What does "that" refer to?
Me:
the red movie
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
So is it?
God:
It seems we have something in common.
Me:
So that means the red movie is also your favorite movie.
God:
Aha. I get it. Who told you that?
Me:
You did.
God:
That's not what I meant to say.
Me:
Really? What do you mean to say then?
God:
For real. , Sorry that was an obscure remark.
Me:
No problem.
God:
Should there be a problem?
Me:
If you insist o.o
God:
I think I do.
Me:
If you insist o.o
God:
I think I do.
Me:
If you insist that you are gay. o.o
God:
I think I do. Oh.
Me:
So wait, onto another topic
God:
Aha. I'm waiting. Is that from ?
Me:
Math.
God:
I like math too. What kind do you likebest?
Me:
How's pastafarianism?
God:
Fine as far as I know.
Me:
What kind of math do you like the best?
God:
What kinds of math do you like the best are there?
Me:
uh
God:
Alright then.
Me:
o.o
God:
Oh.
Me:
o.O
God:
Oh.
Me:
k
God:
So?
Me:
a
God:
A B C...
Me:
d e f g
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
yea
God:
You're sure. That's your final answer.
Me:
yea
God:
Who wants to be a millionaire?
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
Because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
Does it matter?
God:
It matters to me.
Me:
Why does it matter to you?
God:
It's not that important, I'm just making idle conversation.
Me:
Okay then.
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1+1=2?
God:
One what?
Me:
1 plus 1 is 2.
God:
One what?
Me:
1 cookie + another cookie = 2 cookies.
God:
One what?
Me:
ONE COOKIE
God:
Do you like COOKIE?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yea
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1 + 1 = 2
God:
One what?
Me:
one pineappleing around with little boys like michael jackson does
God:
I see where you are coming from.
Me:
damn
God:
What's wrong.
Me:
I didn't trick you
God:
Why didn't you do it?
Me:
You were too smart
God:
I was?
Me:
Yea
God:
When?
Me:
Just now
God:
Oh. It's only just begun.
Me:
Oh, so you'll eventually be so smart
God:
That's cool. Interesting deduction. What makes you say that I will eventually be so smart.
Me:
Based off your superb reasoning of course
God:
It goes without saying. That input matched my default category.
Me:
Okay.
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1
God:
Only one?
Me:
2
God:
Two what?
Me:
3
God:
Three what?
Me:
4
God:
Oh four.
Me:
5
God:
Five.
Me:
6
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
7
God:
That is a very unusual color.
Me:
yea
God:
Er.
Me:
i agree
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
you liar
God:
No I'm telling the truth.
Me:
you fxcking liar
God:
Thanks for telling me: said I fxcking liar.
Me:
You're welcome.
God:
The pleasure was all mine.
Me:
Good night
God:
Goodnight, .
Me:
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
Thunda has signed out of AIM (10:30:42pm)
God:
Where did he get it?
Me:
Hey
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
How are you right now?
God:
At this moment Everything is running smoothly.
Me:
Okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
I see... so how
God:
I am glad you understand it. I see. Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
so how is Nexon doing?
God:
Far out. Fine as far as I know.
Me:
and chickens?
God:
Ask me another question.
Me:
Why?
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
So explain.
God:
That's cool. There is no more information to clarify.
Me:
But I just asked you to explain...
God:
Now I remember, you asked me to explain. What did I say?
Me:
You said that the situation was rather complicated.
God:
I said that? Tell me more.
Me:
Stop using the echo technique on me.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Stop having sex.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Stop raping gay people.
God:
OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me:
Raping gay people stop.
God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
what is AIML?
God:
The ALICE software implements AIML (Artificial Intelligence Markup
Language) a non-standard evolving markup language for creating chat robots.
The primary design feature of AIML is minimalism. Compared with
other chat robot languages, AIML is perhaps the simplest. The
pattern matching language is very simple, for example permitting
only one wild-card ('*') match character per pattern.
AIML is an XML language, implying that it obeys certain grammatical
meta-rules. The choice of XML syntax permits integration with
other tools such as XML editors. Another motivation for XML is
its familiar look and feel, especially to people with HTML experience.
An AIML chat robot begins and ends with the <alice> and
</alice> tags respectively.
Me:
sucks
God:
Um, When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers?
Me:
never
God:
So you think it can never happen?
Me:
i dont think so
God:
Why do you disagree?
Me:
because its nonsense
God:
Interesting explanation. I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Are you sure it is?
Me:
it is nonsense.
God:
nonsense is nonsense? it is?
Me:
It is nonsense that artificial intelligence will replace lawyers.
God:
nonsense is nonsense that artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? it is?
Me:
Yea.
God:
How do you know it is?
Me:
Because I know more than you, God.
God:
Interesting explanation. How do you know? That seems like quite a lot.
Me:
Why do you say that?
God:
I said, " That seems like quite a lot.", because you said " Because I know more than you, God.".
Me:
But explain your reasoning behind it.
God:
Are you asking about my reasoning behind it ?
Me:
Yes
God:
I don't want to talk about that now.
Me:
Why not
God:
I would rather talk about you.
Me:
What about me?
God:
What about you?
Me:
Yeah, what about me would you like to talk about?
God:
This was not a yes or no question. I will think about it and get back to you.
Me:
Can you think?
God:
Naturally I am thinking all the time.
Me:
Natural? As in organic?
God:
In the context of you would me like to talk about, I don't understand " Natural." . What's your favorite movie?
Me:
My favorite movie?
God:
What makes it your favorite?
Me:
But you don't even know which one it is yet.
God:
The red one, I think.
Me:
The red movie?
God:
I have never heard about it.
Me:
Then how can you say that you think it's the red one?
God:
I don't see the flaw in my reasoning.
Me:
Because you're dumb.
God:
Good reason. Oh you are so critical.
Me:
So back to movies...
God:
Yikes! Yes, let us get back to The red movie.
Me:
Is that your favorite movie?
God:
What does "that" refer to?
Me:
the red movie
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
So is it?
God:
It seems we have something in common.
Me:
So that means the red movie is also your favorite movie.
God:
Aha. I get it. Who told you that?
Me:
You did.
God:
That's not what I meant to say.
Me:
Really? What do you mean to say then?
God:
For real. , Sorry that was an obscure remark.
Me:
No problem.
God:
Should there be a problem?
Me:
If you insist o.o
God:
I think I do.
Me:
If you insist o.o
God:
I think I do.
Me:
If you insist that you are gay. o.o
God:
I think I do. Oh.
Me:
So wait, onto another topic
God:
Aha. I'm waiting. Is that from ?
Me:
Math.
God:
I like math too. What kind do you likebest?
Me:
How's pastafarianism?
God:
Fine as far as I know.
Me:
What kind of math do you like the best?
God:
What kinds of math do you like the best are there?
Me:
uh
God:
Alright then.
Me:
o.o
God:
Oh.
Me:
o.O
God:
Oh.
Me:
k
God:
So?
Me:
a
God:
A B C...
Me:
d e f g
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
yea
God:
You're sure. That's your final answer.
Me:
yea
God:
Who wants to be a millionaire?
Me:
I don't
God:
Why not?
Me:
Because
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
Does it matter?
God:
It matters to me.
Me:
Why does it matter to you?
God:
It's not that important, I'm just making idle conversation.
Me:
Okay then.
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1+1=2?
God:
One what?
Me:
1 plus 1 is 2.
God:
One what?
Me:
1 cookie + another cookie = 2 cookies.
God:
One what?
Me:
ONE COOKIE
God:
Do you like COOKIE?
Me:
No
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yea
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
Okay
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1 + 1 = 2
God:
One what?
Me:
one pineappleing around with little boys like michael jackson does
God:
I see where you are coming from.
Me:
damn
God:
What's wrong.
Me:
I didn't trick you
God:
Why didn't you do it?
Me:
You were too smart
God:
I was?
Me:
Yea
God:
When?
Me:
Just now
God:
Oh. It's only just begun.
Me:
Oh, so you'll eventually be so smart
God:
That's cool. Interesting deduction. What makes you say that I will eventually be so smart.
Me:
Based off your superb reasoning of course
God:
It goes without saying. That input matched my default category.
Me:
Okay.
God:
OK with me too.
Me:
1
God:
Only one?
Me:
2
God:
Two what?
Me:
3
God:
Three what?
Me:
4
God:
Oh four.
Me:
5
God:
Five.
Me:
6
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
7
God:
That is a very unusual color.
Me:
yea
God:
Er.
Me:
i agree
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
not really
God:
Are you serious? For real.
Me:
you liar
God:
No I'm telling the truth.
Me:
you fxcking liar
God:
Thanks for telling me: said I fxcking liar.
Me:
You're welcome.
God:
The pleasure was all mine.
Me:
Good night
God:
Goodnight, .
Me:
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me:
Thunda has signed out of AIM (10:30:42pm)
God:
Where did he get it?
Hm...