2013-09-04, 02:33 AM
Marksman Bryan Wrote:hypothetical scenario
guy 1 (b) gets back with ex (who he loves), she says she still has feelings for guy 2 © who she left b for originally. c also has feelings for girl but doesn't like long distance. c also has a tendency to say hurtful things but "always makes it better," takes items and money without asking for his own personal needs "but finds a way to get (girl) something if she needs it"
girl spends more time talking to c on the phone than b, and when b goes out of his way to try and call girl, she is either unavailable or unresponsive (also to texts) even after telling b she will be available to talk at said time.
b is wondering if he is wrong to express his concerns of this situation (jealousy) to girl. Girl is going through a tough time - being kicked out of home because her sister is uncomfortable around her roommates in the apartment she rented with them a few months ago. She is having to remodel a room in her (crazy - Alzheimer's? unsure of condition) grandfather's crappy, unkempt, messy house solely for a place to live.
Girl says she can't deal with extra stress from b (boyfriend) and rarely responds to texts on top of not talking on the phone.
girl used to love b when they first started dating. She loved him very much but it was b's first relationship so he messed a few things up and didn't realize what he had until it was gone. Girl loves b now but not nearly as much as before.
Is b being an idiot with love clouding his judgement? b really really really really wants to be with said girl.
b does not find interest in anyone else in the year since he has known girl
All hypothetical of course. Forrrrrrrr a course paper. yuuuup.
Here's the way I read it:
Girl loves C. The only reason they are not together is that he doesn't like long distance.
She is with B because, well, she does like him somewhat and he's better than nothing.
But she really would rather have C, hence the long phone talks. If the long distance issue were solved, she'd dump B again in an instant.
If B doesn't like being "plan B", he should break it off. Eventually a girl will show up who wants him for himself, and vice versa.
Alternately, if B is dead set on having this particular girl, he needs to find a way to win her heart back from C. Displays of jealously won't do it, and neither will criticizing C's behavior. B should just focus on being the most wonderful boyfriend ever, and hope she notices. Might not happen because she, too, is love-blind.