2013-05-04, 07:29 PM
SO. What's everyone's opinions on taking 'breaks' in a relationship? e.g., no contact or anything.
I told myself I would never attempt such a thing, but it's happening. And it SUCKS. I randomly got the "We need to talk." text this week. Go up to the boyfriends, and he tells me that we need to talk about us. We've been in a happy relationship just about 6 months now. We've had close to little problems. If we have issues, we raise them with each other. But apparently this issue festered in his mind for nearly 2 months and he didn't bring it up to me. I noticed something was wrong, and he didn't tell me. Then he invited me to VEgas with his family, and we were fine for a few weeks. Until now.
Basically, his whole reasoning to break up/take a break/whatever you wanna call it is that he 'Has a gut feeling he has to be single right now'. So, anyways. After meeting ith him this last week, I convinced him to at least talk to me once more when I collect my thoughts, so we decided upon Saturday (this afternoon).
So today I went to go see him...and just. I was ready for the worst. I didn't want to get my hopes up too high, because that sucks. So we talked for a good two hours. He still had no other reasoning other than a 'gut feeling'. He explained it like a math problem... "I want to learn and grow on my own, like a math problem. If I do it with someone else, I don't learn as much." Valid reasoning, good point...But still, I think it's completely drastic that he would want to break up over a gut feeling when we've been fine....
SO. Then at one point he said "I only view you as my best friend. I don't feel anything towards you right now." I didn't really feel anything towards him, either, because well, I've been freaking out about this for DAYS. So my emotions were absent, too. And I tried to explain that to him but he wasn't getting it.
Anyways, so. We got over the "Maybe it's stress because of your finals coming up and graduation and all this other stuff." And then he finally said, "Well, maybe. Lets just...lets just take two weeks of no contact, no anything...and see how I feel then. Maybe once the finals have all come and gone, we'll be fine." SO. Here I am, waiting for two weeks to go by...and just...I don't know what I should feel.
TL;DR: Boyfriend wants to take 2 weeks of no-contact to see how his mind sorts through what it needs to. What are people's opinions and experiences on breaks in a relationship? We haven't 'broken up', but we're not seeing each other for 2 weeks.
I told myself I would never attempt such a thing, but it's happening. And it SUCKS. I randomly got the "We need to talk." text this week. Go up to the boyfriends, and he tells me that we need to talk about us. We've been in a happy relationship just about 6 months now. We've had close to little problems. If we have issues, we raise them with each other. But apparently this issue festered in his mind for nearly 2 months and he didn't bring it up to me. I noticed something was wrong, and he didn't tell me. Then he invited me to VEgas with his family, and we were fine for a few weeks. Until now.
Basically, his whole reasoning to break up/take a break/whatever you wanna call it is that he 'Has a gut feeling he has to be single right now'. So, anyways. After meeting ith him this last week, I convinced him to at least talk to me once more when I collect my thoughts, so we decided upon Saturday (this afternoon).
So today I went to go see him...and just. I was ready for the worst. I didn't want to get my hopes up too high, because that sucks. So we talked for a good two hours. He still had no other reasoning other than a 'gut feeling'. He explained it like a math problem... "I want to learn and grow on my own, like a math problem. If I do it with someone else, I don't learn as much." Valid reasoning, good point...But still, I think it's completely drastic that he would want to break up over a gut feeling when we've been fine....
SO. Then at one point he said "I only view you as my best friend. I don't feel anything towards you right now." I didn't really feel anything towards him, either, because well, I've been freaking out about this for DAYS. So my emotions were absent, too. And I tried to explain that to him but he wasn't getting it.
Anyways, so. We got over the "Maybe it's stress because of your finals coming up and graduation and all this other stuff." And then he finally said, "Well, maybe. Lets just...lets just take two weeks of no contact, no anything...and see how I feel then. Maybe once the finals have all come and gone, we'll be fine." SO. Here I am, waiting for two weeks to go by...and just...I don't know what I should feel.
TL;DR: Boyfriend wants to take 2 weeks of no-contact to see how his mind sorts through what it needs to. What are people's opinions and experiences on breaks in a relationship? We haven't 'broken up', but we're not seeing each other for 2 weeks.