2012-10-18, 08:58 AM
My mother wants me to go back to Canada to complete my education before going to Taiwan. I told her that I want to study in Taiwan if possible.(Meeting my conditions which are a scholarship and maybe a dorm room.) She does not believe in Taiwanese education because my Taiwanese friend told her that Taiwanese diplomas are less important than Canadian ones. I love my mother and for her I wish that I cannot find an scholarship, but for myself I wish that I can find a scholarship there and continue my education and my Mandarin learning. She told me that I have already lost one year of education when I had my depression and that I'm in the process of losing a second year because I'm only learning Mandarin in China and not getting a degree. I understand what she is saying, but telling me these things now is very unsettling to hear. I only have two plans. Either going to study in Taiwan if possible or go back to Canada and study there. I am lost too right now because I can't make applications for anything yet since I'm staying in China the whole year. I'm planning to go school hunting when I go back to Taiwan for Spring Festival. I don't want to make my mother worry. She thought that I wanted to go back to Taiwan because I want to find love there but I told her that love will find me. My ex is going to Australia anyway. I don't know where I stand after this year in China. It worries me. I also recently learned that my dad had a heart attack a while ago but because of his diabetes he did not feel it, he is going to have to take some tests to know when it actually happened. I am so worried. I don't know what is going with life any more.