college acceptance letter.

my gf needs to write a letter to get accepted to college, it's the only college in her country and she's applying for psychology.

we wrote a letter and showed it to a neighbour whos a professor, he gave some harsh criticism.

he basicaly said, you have to write it as if you know nothing about psychology, you have to talk about it as a whole, you shouldn't come off as arrogant.

it has to be 1 page long (very little space to write something so important )

he said a sentance like " the human brain fascinates me " is wrong because it's more focused on clincal psychology.

we're busting our nuts here trying to figure out how the hell to write this damn thing.

Southperry isn't going to write it for ya. Sorry broseph.

Southperry isn't going to write it for ya. Sorry broseph.

My thoughts. I'm sure some wouldn't mind proof-reading and giving ideas, but other than that you're on your own.

I didn't even click twice or whatever.

Ignore.

we're not asking for SP to write it for us, just give abit less vauge guidelines and tips. we're lost. theres only one chance to get accepted and if she doesn't it's a MAJOR problem.
we need tips,suggestions and examples also personal experience with writing these would be usefull.

Maybe if you actually gave us the prompt we could help you, other than LOLIDKWHATTODOSP.

How the hell do you write about something as a whole without knowing anything about it? Disregard professor, earn knowledge. You can't expect the college to refuse you because you show interest in what you want to study.

Dear College X,

Ever since I was a little my mother would ring a bell to indicate that it was time for supper. We would proceed to walk out of our rooms and enter the kitchen where potatoes, string beans, and chicken breast would be waiting to be eaten. One day, my younger brother's mischievous friend, Xigliapop, decided to ring the bell to see what would happen. Hearing it, the entire family came into the kitchen expecting to see the dinner prepared for the evening. Much to our surprise, all we saw was Xigliapop giggling with his hands clutched on the bell. I found it somewhat humorous that the entire family came down due to the ringing of the bell, however I soon forgot the incident as a funny prank that was pulled on me when I was young. Imagine my surprise when I learned about Ivan Pavlov and his discoveries regarding mental conditioning.

Dear College Y,

Ever since I was a little child my parents would put me in a box with white walls on the inside and a small hole which pellets of food came out of when I did good things. When I did bad things no pellets of food came out. Imagine my surprise when I learned about B.F. Skinner and his experiments regarding pigeons.

How the hell do you write about something as a whole without knowing anything about it? Disregard professor, earn knowledge. You can't expect the college to refuse you because you show interest in what you want to study.

EXACTLY! the country she's in is fucking retarded.

we can't post an example because bascily the whole letter was scrapped.

we can't figure out where to start.

Dear College X,

Ever since I was a little my mother would ring a bell to indicate that it was time for supper. We would proceed to walk out of our rooms and enter the kitchen where potatoes, string beans, and chicken breast would be waiting to be eaten. One day, my younger brother's mischievous friend, Xigliapop, decided to ring the bell to see what would happen. Hearing it, the entire family came into the kitchen expecting to see the dinner prepared for the evening. Much to our surprise, all we saw was Xigliapop giggling with his hands clutched on the bell. I found it somewhat humorous that the entire family came down due to the ringing of the bell, however I soon forgot the incident as a funny prank that was pulled on me when I was young. Imagine my surprise when I learned about Ivan Pavlov and his discoveries regarding mental conditioning.

Dear College Y,

Ever since I was a little child my parents would put me in a box with white walls on the inside and a small hole which pellets of food came out of when I did good things. When I did bad things no pellets of food came out. Imagine my surprise when I learned about B.F. Skinner and his experiments regarding pigeons.

I find that to be a brilliant way to approach the letter. Perhaps she could do something like this.

I find that to be a brilliant way to approach the letter. Perhaps she could do something like this.

i'd love too cept, we get the "that's to personal" excuse. has to be more proffessional

Is there a prompt? Would be easier to help if people knew what you needed to write about. I absolutely despise make your own prompt-type prompts. It is so stupid, especially when the grader tells you that they wished you wrote more about something on a different tangent...

General college letters would be something short and to the point, no more unless you can manage to fit it into the letter.

Assuming the college is somewhat professional, they'll probably look for people that differ from the rest she should share what personal interest she has in Psychology. Be personal, but she shouldn't exceed the personal aspect of it too greatly, or else it looks like you're writing your grandma a letter on how your doing and what you want to do in life. Be precise and never use two words when one can mean the same as both of them. What will make HER a better student than the rest for that major? Can she fulfill the challenge? Can she excel in every aspect of the courses she must take?

Answer all those for them, but like your professor said (one of the only things he really made sense on), don't be arrogant about it.

iono where ur from, but i'm studing psychology as well and i recently got accepted. it's ok to be personal, the applications that stand out are going to be the one that get accepted. for mine, i wrote about how i became liking the major, what my experience and thought that i had about it, and what do i want to make out of studying psychology in -insert university- . that way it's personal in a sense that ur telling us ur story of how u became interested and ur experience with the field that makes u want to stick with it, and it's "professional" in a sense that how the university is going to help u further with wat u want to do with the psychology.
hope that helps. i mean i can be honest that the reason that i became interested in psychology was pretty funny and i haven't had much experience in a field, only personal experience within the family, but i wrote about it. just be honest about it and dont make up stories. i was very honest in my paper and many people liked mine because it stands out. and i'm going to one of the top university of psychology in the us so......XD