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+--- Thread: Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? (/showthread.php?tid=70009)
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Doxinator - 2014-02-24
OHAI GUYS. It's been a few months since I've been here. SO HI.
So basically. I've been talking with a lovely boy from Calgary the past 3 or so months. We really hit it off, and I actually went up to go visit him from February 14th-23rd. I just returned home.
Anyways, we got along just as great in person as we did on Skype every night, and it was fantastic. About five days into the trip, however, he admitted that on our first kiss (Which was a drunken kiss in -7 degree weather in the middle of a dark alley in downtown Calgary) he felt no 'sparks' or 'fireworks'. Which, he was right. There were none. Instead, I felt a sense of comfort, safety, and familiarity. And just boys are confusing. The sexual tension the days that followed absolutely awful and we still gave in every time. We're still in the determining stage of what we are. He's just slightly afraid of doing a distance thing, on the grounds of 'no sparks and no fireworks means there can't be a relationship'.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Death - 2014-02-24
Yes but I feel like it doesn't mean a lot coming from me since the girl i'm dating is someone I met on the internet.
Kissing her for the first time HAD to be spectacular.
Anyway, what exactly would you describe the ''sparks'' as because seeing you said you did had a sense of comfort,
safety, and familiarity it seems that it doesn't really matter if there were sparks or not. Those feelings are more important
than the sparks in my honest opinion. Also, why did he admit that there were no sparks to begin with? How much do you
two value this?
I don't think you should think to much of it. If you two feel good together sparks or not you should just go for it.
If it's a long distance relationship however, you two should really talk this through carefully before one makes a decision
you or he might regret later on hurting the other. It's a commitment that's hard to maintain and needs full attention from both sides.
I wish you all the luck though.
Oh and maybe having the first kiss while being drunk wasn't the best thing to do.
No idea how much you two drank ofcourse but yeah haha.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - VerrKol - 2014-02-24
I don't know about sparks, but I definitely get the butterflies in my stomach and this idiotic grin on my face when I'm with someone I'm dating.
Distance sucks. I'm of the opinion that it can work, but only with the promise that you will live near each other when things get serious. More often than not this requires one or both people to sacrifice parts of their life when moving and 9/10 it never happens.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - MuscleWizard - 2014-02-24
I believe the word you are looking for is pleasure, op.
sparks and fireworks are a way to describe the physical representation of pleasure.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Proxied - 2014-02-24
Kisses have a similar effect on me as well, so I don't think the way you two are feeling is grounds for no relationship. (I do the whole distance thing as well, and we do very well together without the sparks from kissing, so I'd say you guys are pretty safe)
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - zeroforeverintime - 2014-02-25
Well I hope for the best for you! I wouldn't know any good advice.... Except follow what your heart says and what you truly feel. As long as you don't make any rash decisions you'll be fine.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Razmos - 2014-02-25
Well, the whole "sparks" and "fireworks" stuff sounds more like a impulse to me, rather than a sign of "2 people meant to be". What should count is the fact that the two of you get along, are comfortable together and feel safe and happy.
I barely felt any sparks at all while kissing my ex, but I still enjoyed his company, and felt very safe and comfortable with him. and that should always be what counts. He really shouldn't jeopardize relationships over something silly like that.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Doxinator - 2014-02-27
We get along fantastically. Honestly, the distance thing made it a lot easier to be 'real' with him. I love the fact that I can look at him, and recall the little things that he's told me about himself. Dreams, fears, memories, etc. When we were in person we got along great. We weren't at each other's throats, and when we had to have a discussion or something serious came up, we could openly and comfortably talk about the issue.
Before I left on Sunday, he suggested that he needed a weeks amount of space while he got some important school things (midterms, study abroad) and family issues sorted out [all of which occurred while I was visiting]. He randomly broke the no contact on Tuesday evening with something trivial about a song we had heard on the radio about a week ago and we ended up chatting for a few minutes after that.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Felicitates - 2014-02-27
[Edit] Oh, I should probably answer the question huh? Yeah. I do. It's a physiological fact that you can't escape.
Beautiful, magical, everything you've dreamed of finally culminating into that perfect first kiss.
Then you realize all it is smokes and mirrors sort of magic. People aren't "destined for each other" like popular media leads us to believe. It's about finding the person who's not only your best friend, but someone who deeply honestly cares about you, flaws and all. It's a partnership 100/100. It doesn't "just happen." It's a lot of work to earn that something we all call love.
Literally, it's just the rush of dopamine and endorphins flooding throughout your brain's opiate receptors. GET HIGH YO.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Christian - 2014-02-27
The first time me and my partner kissed there was sparks. It changes person to person along with the situation that unfolds for the "kiss" to happen I guess.
Best of luck and don't let the "sparks" discourage you at all
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - KhainiWest - 2014-03-05
Felicitates Wrote:[Edit] Oh, I should probably answer the question huh? Yeah. I do. It's a physiological fact that you can't escape.
Beautiful, magical, everything you've dreamed of finally culminating into that perfect first kiss.
Then you realize all it is smokes and mirrors sort of magic. People aren't "destined for each other" like popular media leads us to believe. It's about finding the person who's not only your best friend, but someone who deeply honestly cares about you, flaws and all. It's a partnership 100/100. It doesn't "just happen." It's a lot of work to earn that something we all call love.
Literally, it's just the rush of dopamine and endorphins flooding throughout your brain's opiate receptors. GET HIGH YO.
To add onto this (although I find it ironic coming from you ellie, since you claim you dont believe in orthodox love but that seems orthodox to me
) It's really about communication. A lot of relationships, I mean a lot, die this way. If you're not clear about your intentions, and you decide to make assumptions, things fall apart quickly. Although I don't believe in the first kiss firework cliche. What made me identify what love is, simply the presence of the person was always..life giving. Instant energy for me anyway.
But I stress, communication, if you have that down, you have happiness down. Although not all communication is good either, but that comes with respect not spite.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Five Second Pose - 2014-03-05
I like to think my flint's been spent for a while now.
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Corn - 2014-03-05
What relationships?
Do you feel 'sparks' or 'fireworks' at the beginning of all of your relationships? - Stereo - 2014-03-06
Maybe your kiss was too wet and it put out the fireworks.
Nah I dunno. Personally I don't get anything from kisses no matter how much I like someone so I dunno. Maybe there are better things to spend your time on.