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Love - ImagineAll - 2010-04-27
To many people this single word encompasses the entire meaning for life. At different stages in one life the meaning of this word can mean one of many things. As you grow up and go through relationships the meaning of the word often times changes. Each person has their own unique concept of what love is, and that's what I want to find out.
So my question is, what does love mean to you, and how has your definition of love changed growing up if at all? For you younger people or those who haven't experienced a relationship with another individual, how do you perceive love being? If you can't answer those then how about family? In some way we have all at one time or another loved someone or something. So explain that feeling to me (:
I'm not going to give you chart and have you choose A, B, or C. I want to know what your raw and untampered definition is. Whether it be a single sentence or a page I want to read it. For some of you it could just be your family, girlfriend/fiancé/wife, or even a pet or some inatimate object. Regardless of what it is, tell me.
TL;DR - Define love within you own personal life.
Love - Locked - 2010-04-27
Love sucks.
Pretty much all I have to say about the subject from personal experience. Sure, I've had some bad times and some good times and some overall enjoyment, but it's still not that great. It's great being single because you won't have to put up with much of the drama that circulates around love, but it's also a good feeling being in a relationship because you realise that someone cares about you in another way.
Love - ImagineAll - 2010-04-27
So love, to you, is characterized by relationships, which is something you are not fond of. Interesting.
Reading my initial post there was so much more that I should have put. I'm too tired to edit it now, but if this sees some activity I might revamp it just a bit. Carry on ~
Love - LDIntensity - 2010-04-27
Love yourself and that's it. You won't have to worry about drama.
Sure, others are part of your life but that doesn't mean you must love them.
As for your question...
I don't really have an accurate or 'deep' definition to it. For me there are two ways or definitions to love: the one you feel and the one you think about, or the rational and the irational.
When you say "I love southperry" for example, you really feel anything? Or is it just the way you thought of saying you really like it?
And yeah, my definitions of everything change constantly, if I read this in one week, I'll probably won't agree with myself lol.
No wonder how many times my definition of love has changed.
As far as I can remember, love first meant what I HAD to feel towards my family.
Also it seems you're more interested in who we love, loved and so, rather than the raw definition.
As for how that has changed...I can't remember much about when I was a kid.
But later on, while beign a teenager, it was fun/complicated. Quite enjoyable.
Friends, family, girlfriends.
One or two years ago, I noticed most of my friends were selfish morons that just took advantage of my kindness.
I noticed all the flaws in my family and now I only talk with my mother because I live with her.
And after a girlfriend did something awful to me I started failing in relationships.
Now at the age of 20, I only love myself. I won't disappoint myself or do anything bad to myself. It's just simple and easier for me.
Handling life that way is better for now although at times I get SO freaking bored...
Ehhh...I hope you enjoy...and understand? xD
Love - Orit - 2010-04-27
[video=youtube;c83-bvEowRk]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c83-bvEowRk[/video]
In my personal experience: love is wonderful when it's mutual and everything goes well.
But if not.... it's Hell.
Love - ImagineAll - 2010-04-27
See, that's what's I was getting at! And it's not so much who you've loved, but how those feelings for those people have changed. Break ups, family disputes, etc. The relationship changes and so do your feelings for the person. The very nature of that change changes the meaning of those feelings. Which makes me wonder, is love something that is so fickle that you fall in and out of (in regards to relationships)? Family it's never really one event that changes the feelings but a gradual spiral downwards after a series of disappointments.
Love - LDIntensity - 2010-04-27
ImagineAll Wrote:Which makes me wonder, is love something that is so fickle that you fall in and out of (in regards to relationships)?
Yeap. Both the definition of love, the feeling and the definition or the meaning of your love towards someone can change. So yeah, you can fall in and out.
Love is not the only variable. In regards to relationships, there are tooo many things that might/could change. I'm guessing we're too young "to know by first hand"(?) if there's eternal love or not. Examples of old people that lasted a whole life married don't count because things were kind of different back then.
"To know by first hand" is right?
Sorry, english is my 2nd language. xD
Love - ImagineAll - 2010-04-27
But is it? I can't tell you how many couples (married) I see that are in their late 30's & 40's whose marriages seem to be nothing more than room mates who are dependant on one another, which, really, was the biggest reason most marriages lasted so long in those days. The only reason why divorce was no existent pre-20th century was women being solely dependant on their husbands to support them because jobs for women were almost non existent. Now today we have equal opportunity for both sexes so we see divorce and break ups as common place. People (women more so) are no longer feeling forced into a relationship. So is it people's concept of love that has changed or opportunity?
I can't say I have any faith in eternal love at this point in my life. I've experienced and ended up on the wrong side of love too many times to believe in it. And yet I can't even blame the girls who have done that damage to m. Because while I may not have left them midstream in our relationship, I can sympathize with the feeling of wanting to try something else out, if only for a little while. And yet now, after the relationship, I'm upset one day and happy the next. Why? Because I've found someone else that makes me happy. Someone that makes me forget what I'd lost. Just doesn't seem right to me :X
- In case you're wondering, that last portion is what brought all of this about. A sudden change and I feel better about everything that happened some fourty-five minutes before which made me question my own concept of love and what does it mean to me. I still don't have a proper answer.
/rambling.D
Love - Throes - 2010-04-27
Instead of trying to verbalize my own thoughts and opinions of love, I'm going to copy + paste some quotes from C.S. Lewis because I like how he describes love:
' Wrote:"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket safe, dark, motionless, airless it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable."
Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.
The second quote in particular is one that I absolutely agree with; love is a verb. It is not a feeling. Feelings are temporary and fleeting; even if I am mad as all hell at my husband, or my mother, or my brothers, that does not necessarily mean I love them less.
Having been brainwashed at such a young age that love conquers all, I admit I still hold fast to the idea of eternal, unconditional love. My grandparents were married for 60+ years and loved each other until the day they died. I want my marriage to last just as long. Will it be easy? Hell no. But if we are both willing to work together through our rough patches I don't see why it wouldn't be possible.
I'm a soft, squishy, hopeless romantic at heart.
evidence
Love - Rick - 2010-04-27
Love is just another emotion, like anger, sadness or joy. I don't see why people give it the extra weight it receives.
Love - Rob - 2010-04-27
[color="#000080"]
Rick Wrote:Love is just another emotion, like anger, sadness or joy. I don't see why people give it the extra weight it receives.
Because love isn't an emotion. DUH. [/color]
Love - TøbiasBlack - 2010-04-27
Love is the feeling that someone is worth keeping alive. Love is sacrificing some aspects of yourself for someone with or without return gain. Love is not sitting in bed/on a couch and cuddling with someone, its not exchanging chocolates in heart-shaped boxes, and it sure as f'uck is not intercourse. Lust and affection are too often mistaken for love, and this is the problem a lot of people have. When you truly enjoy someones company, whether or not you enjoy the person, and care about their well-being as much as your own; the persons in your life that you are willing to show the you that you keep hidden from the world are the ones you love.
But i'm old fashioned and all about love. >_>
Love - Wigum - 2010-04-27
ImagineAll Wrote:I can't tell you how many couples (married) I see that are in their late 30's & 40's whose marriages seem to be nothing more than room mates who are dependant on one anotherThis is exactly right. and the keyword is Seem
I have been with my husband for over 10 years. We got married a year and a half ago. On the outside looking in, we appear to be this "roommate" situation. And I'll tell you why. One, i'm not insecure about him. I trust him explicitly. I know what he will take care of, what i need to take care of, and I can talk about anything with him. I've been with him for so long that I know how he feels about things, and know whats important to him. I know his habits, etc. It may seem boring or whatever, but it's comfortable. He fits within my life and I fit within his, and we work together to make what we want out of life. Why did we wait so long to get married? Not out of insecurity or lack of making a decision. We started dating in highschool. Then we had college, then we got settled with careers, a house, and two dogs, and then the timing was right. I wasn't in a rush to get married, because i knew i would marry him, so it didnt particularly matter when it happened.
But that's just what you see on the outside.
There's a huge difference between love and lust. Love is what remains after the lust part has moderated. Sure i still "lust" after him, but the relationship is so much more than simply lust. So while I may not be throwing myself at him at all times, and I don't need to reassure myself about him at all times, and I know i don't need to be jealous with him, and i treat him like a roommate in public view aka a FRIEND, doesn't mean that's all there is to the relationship. It's just that the relationship is at a point that I don't need to throw it's status around to everyone. I don't need to show it off. I don't need to flaunt it around my single friends and I don't need to think about it at all times. It is what it is, and I know how I feel about him, even if it appears that we're doing the "roommate" thing.
If you can't be friends with the person you love, then perhaps he/she's not the right one. Because friendship will form the basis of the relationship once the "newness" of it has gone away.
Love - Rob - 2010-04-27
[color="#000080"]
TøbiasBlack Wrote:Love is the feeling that someone is worth keeping alive. Love is sacrificing some aspects of yourself for someone with or without return gain. Love is not sitting in bed/on a couch and cuddling with someone, its not exchanging chocolates in heart-shaped boxes, and it sure as f'uck is not intercourse. Lust and affection are too often mistaken for love, and this is the problem a lot of people have. When you truly enjoy someones company, whether or not you enjoy the person, and care about their well-being as much as your own; the persons in your life that you are willing to show the you that you keep hidden from the world are the ones you love.
But i'm old fashioned and all about love. >_>
That's pretty much it. But you can't always define love like that. It has some other crazy shapes. [/color]
Love - Khoi - 2010-04-27
There's different types of love. The one I am most familiar with is the one in which couples tends to refer the word 'love' by. I don't have an exact definition of how I would define it, but to put it simply, if I love someone, I am letting them understand me, and they have the power to shape my heart. Whether they build it up when my heart is crumbling down, or just choose to break it, is up to them. But love is just a privilege for them to do one or another, perhaps even both.
Love - ImagineAll - 2010-04-27
Definitely some interesting posts. I'll get to responding to them later though. Have a few errands to run.
Something I want to address before I head off is something that was said earlier. Saying love is a verb (something you're actively doing) versus just another feeling or emotion. I'd like to ask that question. Obviously some people believe have different opinions. For each of you, what is love to you? A feeling, or an emotion?
Love - TøbiasBlack - 2010-04-27
ImagineAll Wrote:Definitely some interesting posts. I'll get to responding to them later though. Have a few errands to run.
Something I want to address before I head off is something that was said earlier. Saying love is a verb (something you're actively doing) versus just another feeling or emotion. I'd like to ask that question. Obviously some people believe have different opinions. For each of you, what is love to you? A feeling, or an emotion?
It is both, but its complicated to explain why i think that.
Love - Alloy - 2010-04-27
There's a HUGE gap between "being in love" and "love"
The first is just a crush. The second is when that crush grows into something different. When you realise that other person is really meant for you. When everything that seemed like a "hole in your soul" is simply filled by that other person, and you do the same to her, when you want to help her more than helping yourself, when you'd die for her...
Seeing that other one as a nuisance for being alone is just not love. It's a sad attempt at looking cool.
It's something people can't understand from others, only from themselves. As for me, I see the true one is more than a simple emotion. And I'm lucky for it.
Love - Khoi - 2010-04-27
If you were to Google a list of emotions, 'love' is listed on there. But that's the generic and common terminology. You can love anything.
Ie: "I love that game"
"I love that shit!!!!"
"I love my sister"
"I love my girlfriend"
All of these have different values and meanings. You can love that game, but is it the same type of love as with your sister? You can love your sister, but can you love your sister the way you love your spouse? I don't consider it as an emotion, but more-so of a feeling.
Love - Alloy - 2010-04-27
Omni Wrote:If you were to Google a list of emotions, 'love' is listed on there. But that's the generic and common terminology. You can love anything.
Ie: "I love that game"
"I love that shit!!!!"
"I love my sister"
"I love my girlfriend"
All of these have different values and meanings. You can love that game, but is it the same type of love as with your sister? You can love your sister, but can you love your sister the way you love your spouse? I don't consider it as an emotion, but more-so of a feeling.
Just to clarify, I was refering "love" as the "real" "falling in love". The ones on the quote are the ones I didn't consider :p